// On: Love//
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When teenagers, especially ones under 16 say they’re in love…
I want to smack them upside the head.
They are 15. 16. However old they are, take your pick. They know NOTHING about love or anything in that category. Not true love, at least.
What they know is just those weird, tingly feelings and fondness for someone thanks to their new hormones that they’re test driving.
You can have a first love while in high school, I won’t deny this. But that love you feel for someone in high school, its a pale impression of the love they’re really feel when they’re 21, 25, 30, 50, etc.
The love that teens in books feel, its on the path that actual adults feel (in a somewhat flowery way) and it gives teens, especially the girls that most teen fiction is geared towards, a false impression that the random kid they like in their history class is their soul mate and that, once she can convince him to date her, they’ll be the most perfect couple ever.
The love that a teen can feel is important. I don’t want to diminish it’s value. But its not something that they should invest in for their whole lives. It can help cultivate who they become as a young adult and a person of society.
Example: bands and singers. Love at all ages helps them write their songs and the emotions they put into the actual music as well as the lyrics.
But I blame a lot of pop culture for insinuating to kids that love can happen so young and giving them false expectations out of that love.
I really, overall in this fucked up rant, just want you kids to know that your first love/young love won’t be your last and it gets more special and better when you’re older. Don’t be dependent on those fuzzy feelings your having for a high school crush. You’re young, act young while you can. Don’t worry about sticky relationships til you have to. And don’t think you know what true love is because 99.9999% of you will not know what it is til you’re almost 30.
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Yes, I kept this in mind as I wrote. Which is why I said I didn’t want to diminish young love’s importance. There are always those rare cases. And those cases are beautiful when they do happen. But I think those cases also warp kids. Some kids can think, “I have to date someone now because they could be my soulmate. If I don’t date now, I’ll be alone forever!”
They’re so rare but its good when they do occur.
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recycledjawbonekissing asked: Okay, so I read your rant. And I approve…
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geminiechelon asked: That I TOTALLY agree with…
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I’m not saying teens shouldn’t date at all. Mostly that they shouldn’t think they’re in love and they should stop throwing the word love around so carelessly.
And yes. It would be nice to have the experience, but what is done, or rather not done, is done, lol.
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I think marriage, while not overrated, is a bit outdated.
It is an important institution and the symbolism is important to a relationship. But I think that many parts of it are so outdated and…this is a bad word for it, but its as close as I can think of…insulting to both people involved.
Marriage was a ceremony that meant the man own the woman. It was a joining of two families, pawning the bride off to the groom. The bride’s family PAID the groom’s family (aka, the DOWRY) and paid for the wedding to get rid of her (because she was a mouth to feed and essentially worthless otherwise). Her marriage to a good family name was the advantage to her family.
I think people today need to see marriage for something different. It is a joining to two people who are supposed to love each other. Its supposed to mean that they love each other no matter what and that nothing should tear them apart.
Clearly this doesn’t always work.
Marriage is such a serious moment in my eyes and I want to know the person I’m marrying trusts me explicitly, loves only me, and that I am their world just as all these things are true of them for me.
But all the crap I see in the world today, makes it so hard for me to believe in marriage.
One day I’d like to get married, but I need to find this person who can see it the same way I do and meet my criteria. I’m not going to collect husbands like concert tickets.
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recycledjawboneskissing asked: Thank you :)
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recycledjawboneskissing asked: This is what I don’t get; why are kids so EAGER to love/fall in love?
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recycledjawboneskissing asked: This actually helped me feel considerably better, thank you.
